There's a whole bunch of things I don’t understand about people who do not Procrastinate.  I don’t understand how they can break through their anxiety every time.  I don’t know how they can keep to their own plans every time.  I don’t know how they must feel when they are successful at accomplishing their work time after time after time.

I do believe there are many things non-Procrastinators do not understand about us Procrastinators.  In this past year alone, I have met two men who were so “on it” they looked at me with disbelief when I tried to explain my area of expertise and fascination – Procrastination.  I really felt in those moments of meeting these men that there was no way those two men would ever understand me.  I was just a different species of being, it seemed.  Come to think of it, I met a woman earlier this year, also a Chinese-American psychologist, who also gave me the sense that I was from some different universe.

Well, I’m here to speak for us Procrastinators, people who may just be misunderstood by a lot of other Earthlings.

Here’s a list of a few items I think other people don’t understand about Procrastinators:

1. We are motivated.  This fact seems to be lost on people who don't Procrastinate. They associate lack of productivity with lack of motivation, which would be, in most cases, a big mistake.
2. We are concerned with what other people think.  Many Procrastinators get their start in Procrastination because they feel an overwhelming need to satisfy the perceived expectations others have of them.  The stress of having to perform perfectly causes the Procrastinator to freeze up and to fail to produce anything well. Ironically, these same well-meaning Procrastinators are seen by non-Procrastinators as uncaring or even oblivious to the needs of others.
3. We are fearful of upsetting or disappointing others.  Please see item #2.
4. We have suffered, including when we have been misunderstood by others. Chronic Procrastinators tend not only to be behind in their work, but also to be spent emotionally from feeling worthless and hopeless.  Although the chronic Procrastinator may appear to be doing well from the outside, on the inside there is a more complicated story.  Procrastinators accumulate emotional wounds and injuries as they remain trapped in cycles of inaction and bad feelings.  Much of the emotional damage is wrought by the Procrastinators themselves, sadly.
5. We are not performing to our potential, but we are longing to do so.  Despite being misunderstood and despite having missed many opportunities, Procrastinators strive for something better for themselves.  The paradox with Procrastinators is we hang on and don't truly give up, even when nothing seems to be going our way.

Writing this kind of post is important to me, because I have spent so many years helping clients recover from these different kinds and levels of misunderstandings from other people and from themselves.  I do not believe Procrastination is an easily-resolvable affliction, as it involves the individual’s ego, skill set, social environment, and emotional life, and the clean up of very big messes.

If you are a non-Procrastinator, please consider lending the next Procrastinator you meet a sympathetic ear or some friendly encouragement.  If you are a Procrastinator, take comfort in the reality that we are all built in very special ways, special even when not acknowledged or recognized by others.  Take the time to work through the layers of meaning behind your own Procrastination.  The time spent doing this type of exploration will always be well worth it.

Please feel free to share any stories you might have about feeling misunderstood as a Procrastinator by posting a reply here.