In the middle of a recent yoga class I was in (actually, in the middle of a pose I was stretching to do), my yoga teacher said, “It’s not about the end pose, it’s about what you learn about yourself trying to get there.” I found myself struck by the wisdom of the comment and by its simplicity. I think I’ve always been goal-focused in some way or another. And I’ve also been pretty impatient with myself and my process of working towards those goals, especially when things aren’t going swimmingly. I have been known to:
- imagine the end point and become frustrated with the wait, the effort, and the uncertainty
- have problems envisioning or committing to anything long-term
- have problems focusing in the present moment
- feel angst-y, anxious, and dissatisfied
- have the impulse to do less, to drop projects and to be apathetic
I definitely still get this way sometimes, but I feel I’ve made some strides in the patience department. In many, many ways, being a psychologist is in vivo training for learning how to be patient. Therapy itself is structured to appreciate the process of changing and not just the end goal. In helping patients to be mindful of their inner monologues, I have been kinder in my own. In encouraging them to move forward, I realize forward movement is such a powerful agent of getting things done. In working with patients week-to-week, I learn to enjoy the beauty of small steps, genuine feedback, and gradual shifts and changes. Together, patients and I can de-focus off the end moment and re-focus on how to craft our movements, step by step. Kind of like in yoga, which is great by the way for learning how strength and patience can go as one.
Where might you inject a little patience into your day today?
Thank you for this and all of your other posts, Christine!
Thank you, Catherine. I appreciate your support. Christine
Glad you used your day off beautifully and simply Anki!